Ya know, this watch, the one with all them fancy words in its name, Audemars Piguet Royal Oak Offshore Rose Gold Rubber Clad, it’s somethin’ else. I seen a picture of it once, shiny and all, looks like somethin’ a king would wear, or maybe a queen, if she likes big, chunky watches. It’s got that rose gold, ya know? Not the regular yellow gold, but that pinkish kind, looks warm, like the sun when it’s settin’.
And rubber, they say it’s got rubber on it too. I ain’t sure why ya’d put rubber on a fancy watch, rubber’s for tires and boots, ain’t it? But they say it makes it tough, so ya can wear it doin’ stuff, not just sittin’ pretty. Maybe if you’re workin’ in the garden or fixin’ the fence, this watch won’t scratch up as easy. I wouldn’t know, I don’t wear watches when I’m workin’, gets in the way.
- This thing, it ain’t small. They call it “offshore,” like it’s made for folks who go out on boats or somethin’. Big enough to see even if you got bad eyes, like me. I gotta wear my glasses to see the time on my little watch, but this one, you probably wouldn’t even need glasses.
- And it’s got all them dials and numbers, fancy lookin’. I bet it tells ya more than just the time. Maybe it tells ya the weather or how fast you’re walkin’. I don’t know what all them dials do, but it looks important. Like you gotta be a real smart fella to understand it all.
Them squares on the face, they call it somethin’ fancy, “tapisserie” I think. Little squares all in a row, like a quilt my grandma used to make. But these squares are shiny, catch the light. It’s the kinda thing you’d stare at when you’re bored, countin’ the squares, seein’ if they’re all the same.
They engrave numbers on the back, so ya know it’s yours. Every watch gets a number, like a cow gettin’ a brand. So if someone steals it, ya can say, “Hey, that’s mine, it’s got my number on it!” I guess that’s important when you’re spendin’ a lot of money on somethin’. You want folks to know it’s yours.
They say it’s a “luxury” watch. Luxury, that means fancy and expensive, right? Like them cars that cost more than my house. I wouldn’t spend that much on a watch, I’d rather buy a new tractor or fix the roof. But I guess some folks like to show off, let everyone know they got money. And this watch, it definitely shows ya got money.
They say you can buy it online now, don’t even gotta go to a store. Just click a button and they send it to ya. Ain’t that somethin’? Buyin’ a fancy watch like you’re buyin’ a pair of socks. But I wouldn’t buy it online, I’d wanna see it first, hold it in my hands, make sure it’s real.
It’s a “sporty icon” they say. Icon, that means it’s famous, right? Like them movie stars everyone talks about. I don’t know much about watches, but I guess this one is a big deal. Folks who know about these things, they probably get all excited about it.
Rose gold, rubber, squares, numbers, luxury, sporty, offshore…it’s got a lot goin’ on. It’s a watch that makes a statement, ya know? Says, “Look at me, I’m fancy and I ain’t afraid to show it.” Not my kinda thing, but I guess some folks like that. Me, I’ll stick with my little watch, the one with the numbers I can read without my glasses.
Tags: Audemars Piguet, Royal Oak Offshore, Rose Gold, Luxury Watch, Chronograph, Rubber Clad, Sporty Watch, Swiss Made, Tapisserie Dial
